Conf in a Conf Session

Shame, failure, and finding your way through it

25-minute Talk

All levels

Timetable

1:30 a.m.-2:00 a.m.

Thursday 16th

Room

Track 4

Audience

Everyone

Key-Learning

- Tips on how to sit with shame, figure out where it's coming from and why

- How to build a habit of kind accountability for yourself

- The importance of rest

At the end of 2022, I failed. I was mentally and emotionally exhausted. I dropped the ball on some things at work, and shame snowballed. This talk will cover how I used shame to make positive changes

In the latter quarters of 2022, I failed. I was mentally and emotionally exhausted, and had some weird niggling health issues. I dropped the ball on some things at work, I panicked, I struggled to pick them back up again.

My focus wavered, the shame built, and I continued to let balls drop. I set expectations I couldn’t keep (and I knew this as was setting those expectations). I stopped doing the things I needed to do to succeed. I wasn’t keeping a to do list/focus area list. I wasn’t reflecting on my work. I was dissociated, ashamed, and desperately trying to keep it all running in the background.

Keeping up a facade of competence, never letting myself ask for help. And finally people noticed. I got feedback that was really useful. It was kind, and supportive. People wanted me to succeed and knew that I could, but I wasn’t currently there.